Your Child's Spiritual Development

As Tiffani stated in her post, the preschool leadership team is reading the book Parenting Beyond Your Capacity by Reggie Joiner and Carey Nieuwhof. Reggie states that no one has more potential to influence your child than you. Your child's spiritual development begins very early, even before birth. It's a journey that begins by praying for him/her from the moment you find out this little one that is God's gift to you will become part of your family. It is your responsibility as the parent to lay the foundation for your child's spiritual development. You partner with the church and any other Godly influences that you choose to introduce into your child's life.

God's grace and love are experienced through your body language and words to them and by telling them that God made them and loves them. As your child builds trust with you he/she will be able to trust God later in life. Modeling God's love reminds them that they are loved and that Jesus loves them.

I am reminded all the time that we never stop parenting. My adult children still look to me at times for guidance. It's such a joy to continue the journey with my grandchildren!

Blessings for the journey,
Pam

Parenting Beyond Your Capacity

The Preschool Leadership Team has started reading Parenting Beyond Your Capacity by Reggie Joiner and Carey Nieuwhof. This has challenged me on my own parenting and how I relate with my two little ones. I would like to share a few convictions that have stemmed from my reading time.

First, Just being together can never substitute for interacting together in a meaningful way(pg.26). We live in such a busy world and we are aways being pulled into different directions. We have work, dinner, t-ball practice, dance, cg, PTA meeting, etc. and we typically just drag our kids around with us... at the end of the day the question is how much was I available to my kids today? By the time we get done doing all that needs to be done we want to sit down and watch tv or play on the computer while our child plays next to us. What kind of quality time are we really giving our kids?

Second, No one has more potential to influence your child than you (pg. 27). No teacher, pastor, or coach will influence your child's character, self-esteem, perspectives, or faith like you the parent will. That is good news! In such a scary world where there is a lot of negative and evil influences we know we have the most influence. The important thing to remember is that this is encouraging not overwhelming. This influence has to do with our relationship with our child, not our exceptional parenting skills! God has given us a love and ability to lead our child. Trust in the Lord to give you wisdom to train up your children!

Third, You are not the only influence your children need (pg. 30). It takes a village to rear a child! We need to be intentional about placing other Christian adults in our children's lives. These important relationship will be vital with each passing year as your child begins to seek approval and affirmation outside the home.

I am so thankful for cLife where there are amazing servants teaching our children about God's love while we are in service worshipping our Savior. I love that I am given the tools to reinforce all that they are learning at home. We together as a village will hopefully live out a love for God that will lead our children to want that same relationship with our Lord.

Tiffani

Introducing a new baby into your family

We have so many young families at c|Life, therefore, we have many new babies on a regular basis. Such a blessing to all of us! Pam and Tiffani and their leadership in the preschool area do an amazing job with our younger kidz on KidzStreet. I enjoy the partnership I have with them so much, I am constantly learning new things from Pam and her joy and love for people is contagious.

Hopefully, the following will benefit you or some of your friends who are experiencing this season of life. If you have other things that have been successful, feel free to share with the group!

Introducing a New Baby Into Your Home...

A newborn will be the focus of attention in any home. This is especially true for a first child. Exhausted parents struggle to make many adjustments and grow in confidence in caring for a baby. I have always thought that the first child was the hardest, because parents don't know what they're doing, and they either get too much advice or not enough.

No child should remain the center of attention in the family for very long. Children should learn early in life that they are not the center of the universe. This is the first step in leading them away from a self-centered life toward one that is intent on serving others.

The early childhood years are important. During this time the seeds of character are beginning to develop. Personality qualities such as patience, thoughtfulness, gentleness, and caring begin to develop at this age.

Here are practical tips for relieving some of the natural rivalry between siblings and helping them to develop an appreciation for one another.

1. Prepare for the homecoming

When a new baby is due soon, begin preparing an older child for the baby's arrival. Bolster your older child's self-esteem often. Give him or her a positive vision for what a good older sibling he or she will be. Say, "You are going to be the best big brother this little baby could ever have. I am so proud of you." Or, "This new baby is so lucky to have you for a sister. You are going to be able to teach him so many things."

Don't be shocked when the new baby is a disappointment to an older child. After all, that little baby isn't much fun to play with. Remind the older child that the baby will grow up soon, and then they can run all over and play together.

2. Have an activity box for the older children

Older siblings often misbehave when Mom or Dad is taking care of the new baby. A special activity box can help at those times. Fill a plastic box with markers, stickers, paper, and other tools for creativity, and keep it in a specific place. This is the "big boy" or "big girl" box, and it comes out only when parents are busy with the new baby. A big brother or sister is the only one who can have this special box.

3. Take the older children on outings all by themselves

Older children resent the time a baby takes, but special outings with Mom or Dad can lessen the feelings. Leave the baby with a sitter and take the older child out for ice cream. Take him to a playground or a fast food restaurant. Let him stay up to watch an appropriate video with you. This doesn't completely solve the problem, but when those times of resentment come and the older child expresses his negative feelings, remind him of your special dates with him alone.

4. Set clear standards of behavior during the early years

We all want others to make changes so that our lifestyles are a little more comfortable—so that our own desires will be satisfied. We are basically self-centered, and we will never completely get over it this side of heaven. When the standards of acceptable behavior are clear to our young children, they will know how we expect them to relate to one another. Be clear, firm, and consistent with discipline.

5. Teach young children to wait

Teaching a child to wait for attention is no fun. It's tough on the parents and it's tough on the child. They won't like it. They may throw a temper tantrum, but they need to learn to wait. God will use a new baby as an instrument to help us teach our younger children they must wait for attention.

Most of the time we want immediate satisfaction of our needs. Learning at a young age to wait is a good thing. So when you hear wails of protest from your child—that they dislikes the new baby because you can't take care of her needs first—hang in there. Your children are learning that the world doesn't revolve around them. That's a good thing!

6. Teach children to look out for each other

Our message to our kids should be, "Brothers and sisters are our greatest treasures. Take care of them. "

This idea is most easily communicated when your children are young. In the middle years, they may view each other more like a chronic embarrassment, or an impossible burden, than a great treasure.

Bottom line, it's sometimes hard work to stay consistent with your example and guidance to your children, especially as they multiply! As parents we can feel overworked and that we give, give, give and it's true you do and you will for a lifetime. But there is joy in the journey and wonderful lessons and joy that comes through it all. Embrace and enjoy your parenthood, remember God is your great strength and Master Teacher and we have each other to share times of struggle and times of celebration with. Lean on these resources and know the best is yet to come.

Rita